Category: Baseball

Trout and Yelich Not Done for Season, Just Going to MVP Farm Upstate

by Alex Poletti

With news that Mike Trout will undergo surgery on his right foot, both the American and National League MVP favorites will not play another game for the remainder of 2019. However, the commissioner has assured fans that Trout and Christian Yelich aren’t done for the season, but just resting at a lovely MVP farm upstate.

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Brewers to Replace Christian Yelich with Pete Davidson for Remainder of Season

by Alex Poletti

Brewers fans everywhere were heartbroken as superstar outfielder Christian Yelich crouched in agony after taking a foul ball off his right knee. After the game had concluded, the team announced that the reigning MVP’s knee cap was fractured as a result of the incident, ending his season. Milwaukee, still in the thick of the postseason race, was quick to sign comedian and certified Yelich look-alike Pete Davidson to replace his doppleganger for the rest of the year.

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Christian Yelich Hopes to Become First Horse to Win MLB Triple Crown

by Alex Poletti

As the Major League Baseball season reaches its end, there are still several questions left unanswered. More intriguing than the tight divisional races or home run records is the National League MVP voting, which comes down to the Dodgers’ Cody Bellinger and the Brewers’ Christian Yelich. Apart from the hardware, Yelich is looking to carve his own slice of history by becoming the first horse to win the triple crown.

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Glass Family Agrees to Sell Kansas City Royals Back to British Royal Family

by Alex Poletti

Kansas City Royals owner David Glass and his family announced that they have come to an agreement to sell the franchise to the British monarchy. This will usher in a new era of baseball to the City of Fountains. The deal also marks an increased interest in baseball across the pond.

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Major League Baseball Running Out of Justin Verlander No-Hitter Puns

by Alex Poletti

As the world witnessed history during Sunday’s Astros-Blue Jays game, Major League Baseball and its press subsidiary MLB.com watched anxiously as they began to realize that they had run out of puns for headlines regarding Justin Verlander no-hitters.

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Aaron Judge Appointed to Second Circuit Court of Appeals

by Alex Poletti

Just days after clobbering his 100th Major League home run, Aaron Judge was given a new role in New York City. The Yankees right fielder will trade in his pinstripes for judge’s robes to serve on the Second Circuit Court of Appeals, a member of the Trump Administration announced.

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