Tag: Kevin Garnett

In Desperate Attempt at Publicity, Washington Wizards Sign Harry Potter to One-Year Contract

by Alex Poletti
Photo by Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports

Ranking as the least important Washington sports team after the recent success of the Nationals and Capitals, and with sports declining in influence as a whole during the pandemic, the Washington Wizards announced on Tuesday that they have come to terms with fictional wizard Harry Potter on a one-year contract, hoping it will increase publicity for the squad.

Continue reading “In Desperate Attempt at Publicity, Washington Wizards Sign Harry Potter to One-Year Contract”

Kevin Garnett Celebrates Hall of Fame Selection by Shooting Adam Sandler

by Alex Poletti
Photo by A24

A surprise to no one, Kevin Garnett was elected to the Naismith Memorial Basketball Hall of Fame on Saturday in a class that included fellow legends like Tim Duncan and Kobe Bryant. To celebrate the tremendous achievement, the power forward expressed his joy by shooting his “Uncut Gems” co-star Adam Sandler in the face with a handgun. Continue reading “Kevin Garnett Celebrates Hall of Fame Selection by Shooting Adam Sandler”